! Sozont #10: The Furry Club

10.  The Furry Club

At the club there were people dancing to Gloria Estefan's Conga.  Some were wearing fursuits, but Sozont had not brought his and had never danced without it, so he went to the bar for a drink.
     —"Hi, Sozont!"  It was Harry.  What stupid character was he claiming to be today?  "DeadDog" said his nametag.  How original.
     —"Hi, Harry."
     —"Get a load of that Dalmatian.  Ain't she a cutie?"  There was a girl coming off the dance floor wearing a spotted dogsuit.  She had removed the headpiece, showing her fair and bony face.  Sozont wondered what Marth looked like as a human.  Well, it didn't matter much; they would just muddle through the RL parts of rutting season and then go back to being their anthro furry selves.
     Harry was still waiting for a response, so Sozont gave him one:  "The increasing number of good-looking furry girls is indicative of a rising tide of alienation in our hy00man society."
     —"Won't you even make an attempt with her?"
     —"No.  I'm just here because my VR unit is broken."
     —"You know, Sozont, you really should pay more attention to your human life.  Find a girl, settle down, *breeding*, all that stuff."
     The idea of "settling down" bothered Sozont.  He couldn't talk about his breeding plans with Marth because so far it was all talk.  Actually, he hadn't even gotten to first base with her.  There was nothing to say.  Sozont mumbled some reply.
     Another fellow sat down at the bar on Sozont's other side.  He was wearing a name-tag that said "Epistemology Wolf".  Sozont exchanged pleasantries.  Epistemology Wolf also liked to live in Furry Fairytale Land.  He seemed to know quite a lot about the physics of that world.  Sozont was familiar with its computer programming issues, including some tricky areas where things had to be patched up, but it all made sense when Epistemology Wolf explained *why* the world needed to have those tricky parts.  Sozont thought it was the most interesting conversation he had ever had with a canine.  Eventually the talk drifted to the topic of RL names, so Sozont mentioned his, and Epistemology Wolf mentioned his.
     Sozont had a synaesthesia moment.  He heard an off-key "clang" inside his brain.  Epistemology Wolf's RL name was one that Sozont had come across before.  It was also Spike the Echidna's name.  He had been talking to his boyfriend and didn't even know it!  But Spike had known.  Sozont considered the possibility of having sex with Spike while in human form.  He had never done that with his own body and it seemed strange to start now, when he was going back to VR tomorrow.  But here he was, sitting next to a guy he already done it with in VR, so wouldn't that be a great choice for first time in RL?  No, Sozont did not want to do it.  What had they been talking about?  Physics.  Sozont tried to talk some more about physics, but it seemed the heart had gone out of the conversation.  Epistemology Wolf spoke laconically and wore a disappointed expression.
     Another guy walked by: "Flambé Bear" said his tag.  It seemed Epistemology Wolf already knew him.  They started talking.  As Epistemology Wolf got up to walk with Flambé, Sozont said "So long, Spike!"  It was supposed to be a friendly gesture, to indicate that Sozont knew who he was talking to, but the angry look he got back from Spike was a complete surprise.
     Sozont decided he was having a terrible time at the Furry Club.  He went back to his apartment.

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-- Pyesetz the Dog